Should I tell my fiancée?

Question 1
Should I tell my fiancée?...  Well me and my girl are really close. We have been best friends for years, and engaged for a few months now. Well I have had this illness since I was a little kid, and she knows about it. However, recently it has taken a dramatic turn for the worst. My lungs are slowly being destroyed, and my doctor told me that I only have a few years at most to live.

Now I have known that this would happen someday, and I made peace with the thought of my death years ago. So I could accept death as it is, and not worry about anything. Just go you know. However, back then I didn't have my beautiful angel to worry about. Whenever my illness flares up a little she has tears in her eyes, and she holds on my tight refusing to let me go.

She knows all about my illness, just not the severity of it. I have already told her brother (my best friend), and all of our close friends. She talks about how we are going to be together forever, and how I am the greatest thing to ever happen to me. How I am the light of her life, and I m the one bulwark that keeps the darkness from overtaking her, and how I am her harbor in the massive storm of life.

Life is ironic, that is for sure. How one month after my engagement to her, and I knew exactly what I wanted to do in life, be with her forever. But now I have this curve ball to fight. I know that if I tell her that she is going to break down, that is for certain. However, I can't stand seeing my beautiful flower cry. She is such a fun loving, amazing, sweet, bubbly, unique girl. One who I fell for the second I saw her.

Part of me wants to tell her, but then I know that she will be crying over me for years to come. And I just want to see her smiling, even if that is at someone else. I just want to know that she is going to be fine.

But the other part of me wants to run away from it. Just break up with her, and get her to hate me. Yes I know it sounds cruel, but I have my reasons. If I do this she will cry, and she will curse my name for all eternity. But at least she could move on faster. That way she can live her life without having to think of the fate of the love struck fool that is Wayne Aurelius. If I do this, then I can find a nice little cozy hole to crawl into and die. I accept my death, and I just want to make sure she is happy.

Or my third and final plan at this time. Just not tell her. Just keep on going as is, and just letting the days go by. Then one day I will die, and thats the end of it. Just as much grief as the first one, but at least she won't be worried about me through the time I have left. It would at least let her live a normal life with her husband (if I live to get there), and not have to worry about anything until my death.

I told all of the people close to us because they are best friends with all two of us since we were children, and I wanted their opinions. And the only reason I haven't told her is because I know what her reaction is going to be :( She is so sensitive, and she cares deeply for me. But I knew a long time ago that I just want her to be happy. I don't mind sacrificing my own happiness for hers.

No I can't have a transplant, because it is a disease that is eating up most of my body. My left arm is pretty bad, and my right lung looks more like swiss cheese. It also effects my stomach and causes me to have random attacks that cause me to cough up blood. For example, I once went to the movies with her, and I told her I was going to the restroom and to go ahead without me. After she turned the corner, I basically ran to the restroom and started coughing up blood for about five minutes. I felt like someone had taken my lungs, and was crushing them in their cold hands.


Oh and either way I am leaving behind enough money to take care of her for years and years to come. So I don't have to worry about her financially. So what plan should I do, or do you suggest another course of action?

(and to those who answered before, I am posting in different sections because it is linked to many different areas)

Answers
1)   Even though it will hurt her, you have to tell her. She deserves your honesty. - James Ford

2)   Wow that's tough.....im really sorry by the way :( i honestly think you should tell her. She deserves to know, wouldn't you want to know if your wife only had a few years to live? God Bless and Good luck - Stephanie

3)   you should tell her.i suggest you don't break up with her because it will only worsen the situation.I'm sure your angel would understand.pray for a miracle.life is not over yet till He says so. - meca

4)   Communication is the best policy. Be totally open and don't hold back since it between loving partners. - silvre

5)   I think you should tell her so she can come to peace with it as well. Grieving has stages. You need to let her go through them as you have. She will most likely be sad but who wouldn't.
Trying to push her away won't work. She will just ask why, either way you'll eventually end up spilling it so just tell her. - Mariana


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Question 2
Is there a way I can talk to my girlfriend about seriously seeking treatment for her bad breath?...  My girlfriend, well really she's my fiance, has horrible breath. We have been together for 2 and a half years now. At first, I think my puppy love made up for it. I don't remember it always being so rank, but I also remember her chewing a lot of gum at the beginning of our relationship. Now we live together and there is no way to escape the death fog.
I am surprised that our pets and plants don't keel over dead when she talks to them/ takes care of them/ breathes around them.
I have very gently talked to her about it in the past. I was honest, loving, and candid. She went to the dentist. She reports to me that the dentist told her to brush. She has EXCELLENT oral hygiene (maybe I should have mentioned that at the outset of this post). I see her brush. Her breath is bad by the time she is wiping her mouth on the towel after brushing.
The smell is so potent that we haven't slept in the same bed in 6 months. It is so strong that it wakes me up at night because I will think one of the pets has taken a shit in the bedroom. That is literally how bad it is.
We can barely ride in the car together. I can't kiss her. We don't have sex because her breath is so bad I feel like I am trying to be intimate inside a sewer system and sucking on a sewage pipe.
It is absolutely KILLING me. She is perfect for me in every single way. We are highly compatible and love each other very much. We generally have very little conflict, we are very well-matched. We are open and honest with each other about our needs, desires, dislikes, and issues. I have talked to her about it so many times that I fear that I can't keep talking to her about it without really hurting her. She says the dentist offers no solutions when she goes. And she goes regularly. He put her on Pepcid to control acid, which she says she has never had problems with (no heartburn, etc). She is a healthy weight, and does not drink or smoke. She took the pepcid for months and there was no relief.
She has tried using probiotics as well.
She has this mouth spray that is all natural made of cloves, annise, etc. When she sprays it, it works for literally about 30 seconds and then the smell is back. She can't keep spraying that stuff over and over again, it would make her sick!
I just don't see how we can have a healthy marriage without physical contact. Even not being able to be in the same room with her sometimes just kills me.
It is so bad sometimes I can smell it all over our house. It literally smells like a broken sewage line mixed with the smell of a thousand rotting, vomit-covered corpses.
Or I assume that these things would smell very similar...
Does anyone have any HELPFUL, EDUCATIONAL ideas that could benefit us?
Her dentist would have diagnosed her with gum disease, cavities, etc when she goes every 6 months if those were things that she had.

Answers
1)   she might have some kind of gum disease - John

2)   Over Exagerating Or What! Dam Dude lol - Irvic

3)   If it's as bad as you described then something is wrong in her stomach and she needs to go to the doctor's. It's not about her mouth, but something in her stomach that could possibly have been there for YEARS. - Katie Rose

4)   When a person has severe bad breath there is a medical term for it called halitosis.

There are several simple and practical remedies that you can try at home as halitosis cure. These include:

1.Brush with baking soda to reduce the acidity in the mouth and make it difficult for the bacteria to grow
2.Brush and rinse using hydrogen peroxide when you have upper respiratory infections but don’t swallow it
3.Gargle with salt water to reduce bacteria in the mouth
4.Avoid eating foods with refined carbohydrates and sugars like cookies, sweets, cakes, carbonated soft drinks, ice creams and syrups
5.Drink sufficient amount of water (6-8 glasses) daily
6.Brush teeth daily especially before going to bed
7.Mix a teaspoon of fenugreek seeds to ½ liter of water, simmer for 15 minutes, strain and drink as tea
8.Exercise and eat fiber rich foods to prevent constipation
9.Stop bad breath and gum bleeding by chewing unripe guava fruit or its tender leaves
10.Eat avocado to remove intestinal decomposition that leads to bad breath

If none of these home remedies work she can actually go to the doctor and get a prescription for it. Since the dentist isn't doing anything to help I'm sure the doctor will.

Good luck. - Kaylen

5)   OIL PULLING:

Utility--- removes toxins from the body, more so from the mouth, gums, teeth, stomach, cervix, uterus, lungs, heart, liver, intestines, ears, brain, etc., etc.
. However, U may use sun flower oil, ground nut oil or til oil, rice bran oil, mustard oil, etc.Procedure: Every morning, in an empty stomach, take 2 tsp of cooking oil.
[saturated fatty acids and oils should not be used, like, Dalda/Vanaspati, coconut oil or ghee] and put it in Ur mouth and rinse it for 10 minutes; until it becomes white liquid. Spit it out and then rinse with luke warm water and then brush Ur teeth
ACUPRESSURE TECHNIQUES:
'health in ur hands' by dr.devendra vora vol.i & ii. Available in all Indian Languages and also Braile lipi, Germany and the French.
The world renowned Acupressurist, an octogenarian and the Bhishma Pithamaha of acupressure in Inda, After treating and caused to treat more than 150000 cases of Cancer, HIV/AIDS, Diabetes, and many other most dreaded diseases---Dr.Devendra Vora has analysed that pressure applied on certain points located on the palms and soles helps to stimulate all organs of the body, prevents disease and assists in maintaining good health. Acupressure also helps to diagnose, prevent and cure diseases like common cold, Diabetes, High Blood Pressure, Migraine, Paralysis, and even cancer, HIV/AIDS. Thalassemia, Muscular Dystrophy, all brain and spinal cord affected diseases.

Utility—Blocked energy + toxins shall be moved from all Ur internal organs to purge in the normal drainage system, i.e., urine, feces, sweat, cough, menses[ladies], vomitting and all the organs shall function upto optimal levels.

With ur thumb, press ur/his/her palms and soles, wrists and ankles on both sides. Suppose pain is felt while pressing a particular point in the palm/sole, u have to press the surrounding area—just like u r pumping out air from that painful point. The blocked energy in any internal organ, be it lungs, heart, stomach, kidneys, pancreas, liver, etc., shall be released along with toxins if any. As a last point u must press middle part of each palm/sole; so that toxins, if any, shall be excreted/purged through urine without affecting the kidneys.
It should be done in an empty stomach or after 2 hours after meals. With this, all the endocrine glands and their hormonal secretions shall be regulated. All internal organs shall function up to optimal levels.
PS-To ensure 100% cure in respect of early diagnosed cases and maximum cure in regards to late stages of Cancer/HIV/AIDS, many other most dreaded diseases etc., one should comply with all the stipulated instructions most scrupulously like rituals. No costs/hopitalization/side effects.Domiciliary treatment is enough.


ALOE VERA JUICE:
U may try aloe vera juice safely. Dosage: 30 ml. + 1 tsp of honey t.d.s.
No trace of glucose in aloe vera juice.

TOP 10 REASONS TO DRINK ALOE Health and Hygiene
Aloe Vera is extremely helpful for your mouth and gums. It also assists in the soothing of minor burns, cuts, scrapes and skin irritations. in Healthy Digestion A healthy digestive tract ensures that nutrients from the foods we eat are absorbed into the blood stream. Aloe Vera Juice has natural, detoxifying abilities. Drinking Aloe Vera Juice made from the pure aloe gel regularly may improve bowel regularity and increase protein absorption, while at the same time reuse unfriendly bacteria and yeast – all done naturally! Immune Support and Function Aloe Vera provides natural support for the immune system Regulates Weight and Energy Levels Aloe Vera Gel naturally, and with regular use, allows the body to cleanse the digestive system. Ensures a greater feeling of well-being, allowing energy levels to increase and helping to maintain a healthy body weight. Collagen and Elastic Repair Aloe Vera can add a rich supply of building materials to produce and maintain healthy skin. - Dr.dhananjaya Bhupathi


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Question 3
Is bar soap good for acne?...  

Answers
1)   To an extent yeah. I mean, it's better than no soap. But bars of soap usually just dry your skin out and irritate it, which could cause MORE acne. Just get some face-wash. - Ditse Devo

2)   It depens what type of soap your using but I would recommend act treatment Like creams but what would help is clean your face when you sweat and clean it when you wake up and when you go to sleep too - Anthony

3)   You should use accutane, it is the best about it you can get information from here http://canmdh91.notlong.com/AAEDqB5 - Marceline Sheehan

4)   NO! It is not good for acne. Bar soap breeds bacteria like crazy! Liquid soap is best. - Mollie Mollie


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Question 4
does smoking have to give you cancer?...  my dad wont stop smoking and i dont want to tell him to stop but now i cry everynight i fall asleepp does everyone who smokes have to get cancer? please helpp!!!!

Answers
1)   My dad smoked from age 16 to age 58. Never caught cancer. - GP

2)   No, but it does, smoking is a dick that way. - J

3)   Kong term smoking can cause lung damage.Your dad has to want to give it up.Tell your dad how you feel. - Kerry Broadbent

4)   Yes, It can give you cancer in your lungs, neck or mouth.
You should tell him, because government taxes arn't going to go down any time soon, so he could find more pleasure in the money he saves and I will allways choose somebody who is obese to a smoker, unless they quit. - Fraser


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Question 5
Is irritable bowel syndrome and inflammatory bowel disease the same thing?...  I have been having either diarrhea, constipation, or loose stools. So far this has been going on for around seven or eight months. I've also felt very lethargic and lost quite a bit of weight. What should I do about this issue? Could it affect my health in a bad way if I just ignore it?
My doctor also told me that I have strep b (vaginal strep). Could that be what's affecting me and making me have these weird symptoms?

Answers
1)   No. IBS runs in families. The other I think is something much worse than IBS. A gastroenterologist should be able to diagnose you properly.

IBS is partly genetically linked, partly diet (ie caffeine plus nuts, seeds or popcorn makes cramps, constipation marble stools and caffeine plus salad makes cramps and diarrhea). Stress makes it worse also.

Inflammatory bowel disease I think has more severe symptoms like bloody stools. I am not as familiar with that. You could google it. - sunflowers

2)   THE SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS YOU ARE HAVING ARE THOSE OF INFLAMMATORY BOWEL DISEASE, NOT IRRITABLE BOWEL. YOUR BOWEL MAY HAVE ULCERATIONS AND YOU DEFINITELY NEED TO HAVE COLONOSCOPY (CHECKING THE COLON WITH A SCOPE AND MAY BE TAKING A SMALL PIECE FOR MICROSCOPIC ANALYSIS)
As for the streptococcus, it is very unlikely that it can cause this. When we say "inflammatory" we do not necessarily mean bacterial infection. Most of the inflammatory bowel diseases are non bacterial. - Akram A


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